What We Say, What Parents Hear

In case, my parents are reading this: Love you :) :P

1. I am going out with my friends.
   And by friends, of course I mean, lots of boys. So please keep calling every ten minutes.
   
2. There's this guy in my office.
   And the fact that I disclosed the gender, obviously means I am going to marry him very soon. Oh and he isn't even TamBrahm. How's that for rubbing it in, huh?
   
3. Today was such a bad day at office. I just want to stop working.
   Take. Horoscope. Now!
   
4. I'm feeling quite hungry.
   Means I did not have breakfast, lunch and dinner.Don't even think about the most logical reason: I have the appetite of a woolly mammoth. No way, Jose!
   
5. How is she pregnant so soon? She got married less than a year back!
   Don't mistake this as a rhetorical question. I really want to hear you say "You're too small to know such things" to your 22-year old daughter!
   
   
6. I was just watching a scary movie. But it wasn't scary at all.
   Although secretly it was. So scary that now I want you to tell me to pray to God, put Vibhuthi on my forehead, drink warm milk before sleeping and keep chanting Ram Ram.
   
   
7. I got my salary today.
   And I finished spending all of it today.
   
8. Oh my god, Ranbir Kapoor is so hot!
   Please tell me about how he must have slept with a 1000 girls. Yes, that will change my mind. After all, that is what girls look for when they fantasize about hot guys. Gayness Decency.
   
   
9. Ah I have nothing to do. Just relaxing at home during the weekend.
   
   I feel so lonely. Could you please call everyone you know in my city and tell them I am coming to visit even though it takes me 2 hours to just get there? You already did that? Gee, thanks mom!
   
10. *No answer on the phone*
    I am extremely angry with you. No, I am dying. Oh wait wait, I am dead already!