The Housewife

Quiz: Are you a housewife?

• You are taking a casual stroll in the local supermarket and you see that potatoes are 30 Rupees/kilo. You:
  
  
  1. Push away at least 3 aunties, grab the plastic bag and start selecting spuds in a manner similar to the guy at the beginning of the 300 spoof selecting babies. 
  2. Meh. You can get them later. You don't want to stand behind that weird female who ran towards them like the wind anyways.
  
  
• Your friends make a plan to watch Mere Brother Ki Dulhan and then go out for a pizza. When they invite you, you:
  
  
  1. Ditch them. You don't want to watch Imran Khan on screen and drool because it makes you feel like a pedophile. And pizza has become boring. Besides, you're in the mood for Upma and 90210.
  2. Wish that the movie was in 3D. You also skimp on the popcorn so that you can properly hog the pizza.
  
  
• You pick up a plate from the shelf and you see that the servant has missed a spot. How do you react?
  
  
  1. Wash last night's curry off the plate using half a Vim bar, obsess over it for hours and think of having a talk with the servant(and then chuck it. What if the servant gets angry and leaves the job? Where are you going to find another servant? The horror!).
  2. What spot?
  
  
• You enter the mall and you head off to:
  
  
  1. More/Nilgiris/Any departmental store of course! They have a big sale and you had brought along your Sodexos!! Best day ever!!! Too many exclamation marks!!!!
  2. CCD.
  
  
• There are some old newspapers lying around the house. You:
  
  
  1. Paper your shelves with them and keep the rest for spreading on the table while eating. That way you won't have debris lying on the table. Pretty smart, huh?
  2. Throw them. Or let them be. It's not like they're bothering you. Whatevs.


• Are you actually taking this quiz?
  
  
  1. Yes.
  2. No.

If you selected:
Mostly 1s: You are a true blue housewife. Go now...your sambar is bubbling on the stove.
Mostly 2s: Congrats! You still have a life! Unlike the author of this piece, who incidentally chose only 1s.